New Fry Alert: Brown's Diner

There have been very few times in my life that I have been disappointed by a restaurant with the name "diner" in the title. A couple of weeks ago, however, was one of them. Brown's Diner, which I was told had some of the best fries in Nashville, doesn't really look like a diner. It does, however, appear to be a hole-in-the-wall kind of place. While I wasn't immediately impressed with the atmosphere once I stepped inside, I still sat down ready to try out their food. The menu seemed to have a good selection, and rather reasonable prices for this town. When it came time to order drinks, however, the diner earned its first serious mark: they do not sell sweet tea. Now, I'm not really a sweet tea drinker myself (I actually can't stand the stuff) but I've lived in the south long enough now to require its presence at any dining establishment... especially a local, non-franchised one. Even bad sweet tea seems slightly more forgivable than NO sweet tea.

Still, I was already there, and so decided to try it out. I ordered my usual burger and fries, while my buddy ordered chili. The burger and fries were okay. Not great, but not terrible. Unfortunately, however, they were still a far cry from the best fries in town. The chili, I was told, was awful, and that it tasted like bleach. This makes a pretty heavy strike two. Inedible food is inexcusable, especially with something as simple as chili. Strike three came in the wait service. It wasn't bad by any means, but it was the kind of experience where you felt like you were being waited on by an older version of a Stepford wife. She was sweet, but too sweet. The kind of sweet that seemed so fake that you would almost rather the person cursed at you than say anything else nice. All in all, it was not a successful dining experience. Made even more painful by the fact that I felt I wasted what little disposable income I have on a negative meal. Needless to say, I will not be heading back to that place in the future.

Today's Wit: What kind of ship does Dracula use? A blood vessel!